The Adventures of Bud & Herb

The Adventures of Bud & Herb: The Crystal Ball Caper
S01E04
===

Herb: [00:00:00] The sleepy idyllic town of Mystra's Glen is home to a predator. A beast walks the outskirts silent, yet deadly. Who will fall prey to its nightmarish stench? This is Mysteries of the Verdant valley.

Bud: Welcome back to another episode of Mysteries of the Verdant Valley, I'm Bud.

Herb: And I'm Herb. So Bud, after we spoke with Gerty McGillicuddy, Mystra's Glen's very own mystic and soothsayer, we discovered we've got a bit of a side quest that we have to do for her before she's gonna be able to have another vision, which we hope is gonna help us find where little Theo Diggle is. But that means we gotta get her crystal ball, right?

Bud: You're exactly right, Herb. And as you know, Gerty done lost her crystal ball in a game of Tathesia [00:01:00] Hold'em and well, it ended up at old Barlow Bristlebottom's pawn shop. So we went by there to see if we could strike up a deal, but the thing was, he done already sold it.

Herb: It was bought by none other than Mayor Dinglehopper himself.

Bud: Mayor Dinglehopper hisself. But we're gonna go borrow it from him.

Herb: We're just gonna be borrowing it without asking for permission. You know, we're gonna put it back before anyone knows it's gone. It's fine.

Bud: Yeah, exactly. You know, better to ask forgiveness and all that. It's best not just not bother the Dinglehoppers. They ain't gonna mind if we just go on up there to Dinglehopper Castle and, and get it. And, um, there, there is one catch, though.

Herb: There's always a catch!

Bud: Oh, there's always a catch. Always. So, okay, the word on the street is Dinglehoppers have the crystal ball but, it's in a vault that's said to be [00:02:00] uncrackable. Uncrackable.

Herb: Well, I'm surprised, number one, that he would have put his shopping in a vault that's uncrackable already. I mean, doesn't it sit out by his front door for at least a week before you do anything with it?

Bud: I know, right?

Herb: Number 2, if it's already in the uncrackable vault, how are we gonna crack it?

Bud: Well, that's an excellent question. The other layer to this is that not only is the vault, said to be uncrackable, but the whole ding dang castle is also said to be locked up tighter than a bumblebee's boogie hole.

Herb: Oh, that's pretty tight and fuzzy.

Bud: It is super tight. Security measures are high. So, what does that mean? Means we are going to need some extra help. Look, you know, I had kind of a colorful past and, um, I know a lot of talented people. So.

Herb: Oh, wait, wait, you're talking about when you used to steal @#$% for a living?

Bud: That is exactly right.

Herb: Okay.

Bud: I reached out to one [00:03:00] such individual who I believe can help us with this particular problem.

Herb: Oh you did? Okay.

Bud: Oh, I did. In fact, I already invited him down here and he's just in the other room. Da'ryl, Da'ryl, come on in here, man.

Herb: Oh, that's fast.

Da'ryl: Yeah. Hello. Hello. Is this, where?

Herb: Hey, hey Da'ryl. Yeah, just ignore the Mycorder. Yeah, sorry, sorry. Continue. Hi.

Da'ryl: Yeah.

Bud: Talk natural, man. It's all good.

Da'ryl: Okay, first, you really should know by now that it's pronounced Da'ryl.

Bud: Yeah, that's what I said. Da'ryl. Herb, I would love to introduce you to my old friend Da'ryl. A long time ago before you and I had ever met, Da'ryl here and I did like lots of jobs together, and I will tell you this, he is the best safe cracker I've done ever met, as well as an expert planner to boot. I mean, every job we did. Wow. I mean, just like chef's kiss. Anyway, to get us into this castle, [00:04:00] crack that crazy vault, I just figured we're going to need old Da'ryl here. So Da'ryl, why don't you please go ahead, introduce yourself to all the listeners out there.

Herb: Hi Da'ryl, it's really, really great to meet you.

Da'ryl: Yeah. Hello, uh, I do know noble drow names can be difficult to pronounce for some. I am Da'ryl, Master Thief.

Bud: Okay. Da'ryl, welcome.

Da'ryl: Thanks for all the nice words, Bud that was kind.

Bud: Oh man, you deserve it. You earned it. You're just, oh man, just, y'all out there, if you need to break into a vault, please contact Da'ryl. So Da'ryl, how are we gonna do this? How are we gonna get inside Dinglehopper Castle? How are we gonna get inside that vault?

Da'ryl: Well, Bud, as you said, this job is more complicated than just getting into the vault. First, we must get past Dinglehopper Castle security.

Bud: That's right. It's gonna be tricky.

Da'ryl: Yeah, you could say that. Dinglehopper Castle is on an [00:05:00] island surrounded by Lake Alovan. It's connected to the mainland by a single bridge. Now, getting across the bridge unnoticed is damn near impossible, scrying eyes in the area roaming the grounds, there are wards that detect invisibility.

Herb: Wait, wait, wait, wait. What's a scrying eye?

Da'ryl: Oh it's a, uh, scrying eye. It's like a magical floating orb. Transmits all it sees to a central location, somewhere to be monitored. Most likely in this case a security station of some sort, or perhaps even the Sheriff's Office.

Bud: Oh, all right. Well, so what's the plan?

Da'ryl: I'm glad you asked. Breaking into this castle is a three step process.

Herb: Oh.

Da'ryl: Step one, get across the lake to the backside of the house. Step two, enter the castle via the sewer drainage system, and step three.

Bud: Oh, wait.

Da'ryl: Get inside the [00:06:00] vault.

Bud: Uh, oh, okay. Well, I don't know. That don't sound too hard.

Da'ryl: Well yeah, it may be easier said than done, but most importantly, we need to get started immediately as time is of the essence.

Herb: Mmm.

Da'ryl: The Dinglehoppers will be out of the house this evening for a fundraiser for Rosie and Dougie Diggle. Our window is already closing so we must be swift.

Bud: Swift. We could do Swift, man. Herb here is fast as a mother@#$%. Ain't that right, Herb?

Herb: I'm super fast. Fast as a mother@#$% is right.

Da'ryl: Before we get going, we will require a few things. Herb, I understand you are an incredible chef. We'll need some food. Lots of it. Any chance you already have something prepared?

Herb: Do I have something prepared? Uh, yeah. I got 12 pans of enchiladas and 20 pounds of totchos that the mayor's office thought was too [00:07:00] childish for the fundraiser tonight.

Da'ryl: Bud, bring one of your portable holes. That is important.

Bud: Portable holes huh? Yeah, of course. Uh, yeah, I'll grab one of them and um but what's the, what's the enchiladas for?

Da'ryl: I'll explain when we get there. Herb, go get the enchiladas and meet us at Lake Alovan. I've marked where we'll be on this map.

Herb: Oh, will do.

Scene 2: Lake Alvin
---

Herb: Sorry. Sorry. That took so long. Running was really hard with 12 pans of enchiladas. I was not anticipating that. I did bring forks though.

Da'ryl: Bring it. Bring it down just a level we gotta be.

Herb: Sorry.

Da'ryl: Quiet. But yeah, you got the enchiladas?

Herb: I, I did. I also brought some forks and napkins too in case it got a little messy.

Bud: Ooh, I'll take one.

Herb: Okay, here.

Da'ryl: They do smell delicious. But actually, just put them in my bag of holding here, please?

Herb: Oh, oh, shh, sure, sure, okay, okay, here you go.

Da'ryl:[00:08:00] A storm's coming. We really shouldn't linger.

Bud: Da'ryl this lake it's a little bit bigger than I anticipated. So, uh, what I'm wondering is, where is the boat that's gonna get us across?

Da'ryl: Yeah, we can't risk taking a boat. We could easily be spotted by a scrying eye.

Bud: You ain't got no boat. So, how we getting over there?

Da'ryl: Well, Bud, we'll have to swim. How's that sound?

Bud: Swim! What the @#$% you talking about? I can't swim!

Herb: It's okay, Bud, don't you worry. I am an excellent swimmer. I'll pull you. Here, here, tie this rope around your waist. Come here, come here.

Bud: Wait, oh, hang on, hang on, hey! mm mm, come on, but.

Da'ryl: Look, you two, we must go now and splash as little as possible.

Bud: What does that mean?

Herb: Uh, you okay back there, [00:09:00] Bud?

Bud: Oh yeah, yeah, I'm great. Oh yeah. Loving this.

Da'ryl: Keep, keep it quiet.

Bud: Uh, y'all.

Da'ryl: Shhh. Bud.

Bud: Y'all!

Da'ryl: Bud, gotta be quieter.

Bud: There is something down there in the water.

Herb: What? What? What is it?

Bud: I don't know. I just saw a shadow, but it is, it's big.

Da'ryl: Well, I'd hope we'd make it across without it sensing us.

Bud: What the? Without what sensing us?

Da'ryl: The eel.

Herb & Bud: Eel!

Da'ryl: Oh, shhh, yes, the eel.

Bud: What the @#$% man? That is one big ass eel. That ain't natural man.

Da'ryl: Herb, here take the enchiladas.

Herb: A giant eel? You know, they used to be cryptids.

Da'ryl: Herb.

Herb: Yes?

Da'ryl: The enchiladas, please.

Herb: Right, right, Sorry, sorry, sorry. Got 'em. Got 'em.

Da'ryl: Okay,

Bud: Da'ryl [00:10:00] what the @#$% are you doing man?

Da'ryl: Listen, the eel hungers, and we will feed it.

Bud: Oh yeah, oh, we gonna feed it. We're gonna feed it our dead bodies!

Da'ryl: Calm yourself. This is a powerful sleeping draft. Herb, can you help me mix this in?

Herb: Oh sure, sure, yeah.

Bud: Y'all, uh uh, uh uh, whatever the @#$% you're doing, you gotta do it quicker. It's getting closer y'all, hurry up, hurry the @#$% up man.

Da'ryl: Okay, this will have to do. Ugh, ugh. UGH!

Bud: Do you see it? Where'd it go? Maybe it don't like enchiladas.

RAWR!

Herb: Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!

Bud: Holy @#$%! We're gonna die! It's eatin' it! It's eatin' it! It took the bait!

Da'ryl: Swim!

Herb: Everybody get on my shell.

Bud: [00:11:00] Holy @$#%, holy @#$%, holy s@#$, man. It don't look too sleepy. How long before it goes night night?

Da'ryl: I don't know.

Bud: You, you, you don't know?

Da'ryl: I'm not sure. It's a bit bigger than I expected.

Bud: It's big as @#$%. Herb, swim faster, man!

Herb: I'm swimming as fast as I can, Bud. Hold on.

Bud: Da'ryl, you got some more of that sleep juice, right?

Da'ryl: That was all of it. Herb, we're nearing the castle wall. Get us close to that grate. That's the sewer.

Herb: Okay, I'm on it.

Da'ryl: Bud throw the portable hole against the castle wall.

Bud: Holy @#$% it's right on us!

Da'ryl: Throw it!

Bud: Dear Gods, I promise never to steal nothin ever again. Just don't let me get ate by that big slimy freak!

Da'ryl: Throw it! What in the gods? Are those beans?

Herb: Beans!

Bud: Beans! It's Pickle's Beans! I forgot they were in there!

Herb: Wow, that is a lot of beans. [00:12:00]

Bud: Man, that eel really likes them beans.

Da'ryl: Quick! Herb, get the sewer grate off, and then get in the hole.

Herb: The sewer hole? I can't fit! I'm too round!

Da'ryl:Portable hole!

Herb: Oh! Mmmmmmm!

Bud: Ok what now?

Da'ryl: Now you must crawl through the sewer pipe.

Bud: Me? What, about y'all?

Da'ryl: Yeah, the pipe is too small for Herb and I. We'll be here, inside the portable hole, while you make your way through the sewers.

Bud: Whoa, hang on. I'm gonna crawl through some Dinglehopper dingleberries while y'all are stone cold chillin in a nice, cozy, portable hole.

Da'ryl: Yes, and we'll only have 10 minutes of oxygen. So, you must be swift. Try not to get lost.

Bud: How am I gonna know what ten minutes is up?

Da'ryl: Here, take this timer, set it to ten, and wind it up. Bud, [00:13:00] go!

Bud: Oh, @#$%!

BuggemOUT:
---

This episode's brought to you by BuggemOUT®! Bugbear Deterrent Spray. BuggemOUT!®, the original brand of personal defense sprays is designed to be easy and safe to use. Just grip, flip and spray. BuggemOUT®! sprays up to 32 feet, creating a burning sensation to the skin, eyes, nose and throat neutralizing your bugbear attacker for up to 45 minutes, giving you time to flee and reach safety, or slay your assailant while they're down.

Developed in conjunction with The Solis Academy, this innovative formula contains 2% liquified gelatinous cube juice. The maximum amount allowed by law. BuggemOUT!® quickly works to deter all bugbear attacks with up to 50% effectiveness for other goblinoid species.

It's got a four year shelf life and is made right here in Mystra's [00:14:00] Glen. Caution, in a small amount of cases, target bugbear gains immunity to blindness, charmed, deafness, exhaustion, frightened or prone states.

Certain side effects may occur. Contact your doctor immediately if you experience the following symptoms, diarrhea, dizziness, fatigue, nausea and vomiting, insomnia, loss of hearing, sight, smell or taste, mindless predatory urges, attraction to warmth, asexual reproduction, pseudopods, chronic halitosis, and explosive gas.

Don't let bugbears catch you by surprise, turn the tables with BuggemOUT!®

Scene 3: In the Hole
---

Herb: So, Da'ryl. Right? I'm try, I'm trying to make sure I pronounce your name right. It's, it's kind of hard though. It's, it's Da'ryl, not Darrel? Or is it Darrel?

Da'ryl: Da'ryl.

Herb: Da.

Da'ryl: Da'ryl.

Herb: Da'ryl. Got it.

Da'ryl: Yeah. It's better than Bud. Honestly.

Herb: [00:15:00] Taking a little bit of a breath after that swim is quite nice. And, you know, I've never been sat in a portable hole for a while. I did hang out while Pickle was putting a lot of beans in all the holes for the promotion and everything. But it's, it's, it's interesting to experience the inside of one. Quite dark, actually. So, yeah, it's actually so nice to, to use this time to, get to know you a little bit.

Da'ryl: Is it?

Herb: Yeah.

Da'ryl: Is it, does this feel like the best time?

Herb: Why, sure, why not? No time like the present.

Da'ryl: Yeah, I guess.

Herb: So, okay, well, how long have you known Bud?

Da'ryl: Oh, maybe a century? Give or take a decade or two, yeah.

Herb: Oh, wow, that's, that's a long time. Wow. Were you best friends?

Da'ryl: Uh, no.

Herb: That's a shame, he's a pretty good best friend. Hmm. This is actually really helpful because I can really get to know you this way. I find that a person's produce preference [00:16:00] says a lot about them. What do you think you would consider your favorite vegetable?

Da'ryl: Mmmm, probably basil.

Herb: Oh! Interesting.

Da'ryl: Does that count as a vegetable?

Herb: Sure why not? I mean, it, it is a herb, but I am also a Herb, so I like that answer.

Da'ryl: Right. I guess I'm trying to conserve air. So.

Herb: Oh, Why?

Da'ryl: Oh, uh, cause we're in a hole and there's only so much air in here.

Herb: Bud's got 10 minutes, right? I mean, how hard could it be to just swim through a little bit of Dingleberry deuce?

Da'ryl: I mean, hmm, I don't really want to find out.

Herb: True. He did get the short end of the stick in this one.

Da'ryl: Well, that's how the plan goes sometimes. That's alright, he's done it before.

Herb: He's done it before? Tell me tell me more. I like to hear stories about Bud from before we met. You know, I don't get many of them.[00:17:00]

Da'ryl: Uh, yeah, he climbed through a sewer once.

Herb: That's it? That's there's not more to the story?

Da'ryl: What more do you want to know?

Herb: I don't know, like, what were you guys doing?

Da'ryl: We were on a job.

Herb: You were on a job? Uh, anything interesting? Were you like, uh, I don't know, stealing some fresh sourdough?

Da'ryl: It's confidential.

Herb: Oh! That's kind of sexy.

Da'ryl: I don't share secrets about past jobs.

Herb: Oh. You know what? I respect that. I respect that. Hmm. You know, I can't get over the smell of beans in here. It's pretty strong.

Da'ryl: Hmm, yeah.

Herb: What would you say your favorite type of beans is?

Da'ryl: Look, we, uh, we only have so much air, so, maybe we should just sit in silence maybe?

Herb: Oh, okay, we could do that for a little bit. Hey, what's your favorite color?

Da'ryl: Black. I wear a lot of black, I [00:18:00] guess.

Herb: Black is sexy. Black is sexy. I don't wear a lot of clothes. I've got a sun bonnet, I've got a chef's hat. I did get one of those little, like, winter earflap things. It's very cozy, but

Da'ryl: You have ears? Sorry, is that rude?

Herb: Oh. Well, I've got like little holes. I mean, the earflap just keeps my, my chin, like the side of my face warm.

Da'ryl: Okay, yeah, that's fair. Well, you know what? I wonder how many seconds we could sit here without talking.

Herb: Oh! That's a fun game. Okay. What's your favorite dessert? I really like so many different options. I mean, look at the simple, humble cookie. You could bake so many different things out of it, but I'm, sorry, I'm getting away from myself. Are you hungry? The shell is fully stocked. Would you like something?

Da'ryl: Let's eat. Let's, let's spend some time eating, yes.

Herb: Okay, great. [00:19:00] Let's see, I've got some carrots, I've got some cucumber.

Da'ryl: Whatever you have, let's chow down on it right now and, and just focus on eating. Let's do that.

Herb: Oh, okay, sure.

Da'ryl: How's that sound?

Herb: That sounds really wonderful. Sorry that I don't have any basil. I, I did have some basil last season, but I switched it out for some rosemary, just to get a nice, lovely scent that wafts everywhere I go. It's just so great. But here, oh, you know what? We could make like a little spring roll situation. I've got some cabbage. I've got some, like I said, I've got some carrots.

Da'ryl: You don't have to talk me through it. Just yeah. Surprise me.

Herb: Oh, okay. Sure. Well, here, grab what you want. Did you get, did you get some stuff? You know, there's some onions on there, too, if you just want a little extra crunch.

Da'ryl: Yeah. Sure. Here.

Herb: Oh, thank you. It's kind of hard to do this in [00:20:00] the dark. I've never tried to cook in the dark before. This is pretty interesting. Well, I guess I'm technically not cooking. I'm just making some spring rolls. You know, Da'ryl, it's been an interesting day. I gotta say. Didn't expect to meet one of Bud's old friends, but I'm very excited to me you.

Da'ryl: Mm hmm. That's nice.

Herb: Anything, uh, anything you have, uh, questions, about me? And, I mean, just in case you were wondering, you know?

Da'ryl: Mm. Maybe later.

Herb: Okay. Do you like karaoke?

Scene 4: Dinglehopper Castle
---

Bud: Oh gods. Oh god, I think I threw up in my mouth. Somebody kill me. This ain't natural, man. Oh gods. Okay, I'm gettin' too old to be chased by big ass monsters and slathered up and Dingledooks. What the @#$%, man, that is loud. Someone's gonna hear that. Shut up, shut the @#$% up @#$%! Shut up! Ok. Oh, shoo, okay, that's better, alright.[00:21:00] Oh @#$%! Herb! Da'ryl! Okay. Oh god. Y'all alright? Oh thank the gods y'all are alive. Oh man, this is too much y'all. I was worried y'all had run out of air, got all corpsified. Oh my gods, this is too much man. My nervous system can't take it.

Herb: No, don't worry about it, Bud. We're fine. I mean, I can hold my breath for an hour, so I'm good.

Bud: Whoa, Da'ryl. You alright man? Here, sit down over here, man. Get a little sip of water.

Herb: Oh, yeah, he's fine. We had a lovely chat.

Bud: Yeah, you look good. Your skin looks a little, I don't know, green. You alright? Okay, alright, let's get to it, man. Quicker we grab that crystal ball, get out of here. Sooner I can take me a shower. You know what I'm sayin? You smellin this?

Herb: Yeah, Bud. It's, you smell really bad.

Bud: Real bad.

Herb: Like Cinderwood Walker bad.

Bud: I know, man. Cinder Woodwalker ain't got @#$% on me. Am I right?

Da'ryl: All right. Let's go. Keep your voices down.

Bud: What?

Herb: I thought you said [00:22:00] no one was home.

Bud: Yeah.

Da'ryl: As far as I know, that's true, but we can't be too cautious. Here through this door. Follow me.

Bud: Shhh. Herb! Shh! Shush.

Herb: You shush.

Bud: No, you shut up man! You're being too loud.

Herb: You're too loud!

Da'ryl: Shhh!

Bud: Stop shushin me, man!

Herb: Wow, the Dinglehoppers sure have a lot of stuff in this basement. It's like a maze down here.

Bud: Oh, yeah. And some of this stuff looks pretty valuable too.

Herb: Yeah, it does. Oh, check out this portrait of Grandpappy Dinglehopper.

Bud: Oh man, that's an ugly SOB.

Da'ryl: Shh! You two, focus up, either take the portrait or leave it, okay. Let's go, come on.

Bud: Alright, alright, don't get your pantaloons in a bunch.

Da'ryl: Shhh!

Bud: What?

Da'ryl: Listen!

Herb: What is [00:23:00] that?

Da'ryl: SCRYING EYE!

Bud: Oh @$#% we're busted. Da'ryl, I hope you got something good up your sleeve.

Da'ryl: I can, I can cast invisibility, hold on.

Bud: Okay, okay, okay, what are you waiting for?

Da'ryl: Just need the it's, it's,

Bud: Come on man.

Da'ryl: Somewhere, somewhere.

Bud: Hurry up.

Da'ryl: I'm hurrying!

Bud: It's looking right at us.

Herb: Got it!

Da'ryl: What did you do?

Herb: I killed it.

Da'ryl: If they didn't know we were here before they definitely know now. To the vault, quick!

Herb: Oh, sorry.

Bud: Don't be sorry, Herb. I thought that was kick ass, man.

Herb: Thank you.

Da'ryl: There's the vault. It's majestic.

Bud: Wow. Da'ryl, you ever seen anything like this before?

Da'ryl: Once, long ago. I believe this is a speaking vault.

Bud: Whoa.

Da'ryl: Once [00:24:00] activated, it will show us a series of riddles. First, we must find a pressure plate to activate it. Look here. This slab is more worn than the others.

Bud: Oh, hey, whoa, what's that sound?

Da'ryl: That would be the timer starting. We must solve these riddles in the allotted time.

Herb: But what if we don't?

Da'ryl: Then the vault will not be able to open for 24 hours, an alarm will sound, and, you know, maybe other things? I'm not entirely sure. Look! Look here. Buttons with pictograms on them. Okay, a serpent eating its tail. We've got a person. This one's clearly a skull. I think that's probably a tree? Here, a crescent moon and a flower. And writing there. Look. Along the outside. From the blood of the moon [00:25:00] two become one. After a tremendous toil. I see the sun. The sun.

Bud: From the blood of, uh, oh, a tree. A tree goes up towards the sun.

Da'ryl: A tree, yeah, could, could be.

Bud: Yeah, yeah, no, no, it's gotta be. Gotta be the tree.

Da'ryl: Bud, no.

Bud: That didn't sound good.

Da'ryl: Ugh. We can only make three mistakes or else the vault will stay locked.

Bud: Three mistakes? Why the f@#$ you didn't say something? Mm hmm.

Da'ryl: I was trying to, you just jumped in there

Bud: Not hard enough, man.

Da'ryl: too fast.

Herb: Oh! A child!

Bud: Say what?

Herb: The riddle, it's a child.

Da'ryl: Are you certain?

Herb: Yeah, the pictothingamajiggy. It isn't a person, it's a kid.

Bud: Oh, sounds good to me.

Da'ryl: Yeah, I'm not sure.

Bud: Clocks a tickin'. Hit it, Herb. That's what I'm talkin' bout! Woo Herb. Get it.

Herb: Another riddle!

Da'ryl: Ooh, [00:26:00] okay. I'm offered to the loved and to the dead. I've pierced veil and flesh anointing with red. Anointing.

Bud: Mmmm, that tree is lookin' pretty dead.

Da'ryl: Or maybe it's the serpent. You know, its bite anoints red, right?

Herb: Ooh, ooh, I think I know it. It's, it's a flower. The flower's a rose.

Bud: Oh snap! Two for two! Two for two. You're good at this, Herb. Say hoo dee hoo!

Herb: Thanks.

Da'ryl: Okay, yet another riddle. I have no end and am the ending of all that begins. I'm the root of time and the branches of fate within.

Bud: Branches of fate. Root of time. It's a tree. Click.

Da'ryl: Dammit.

Bud: Oh @#$%, man.

Da'ryl: Look, one more mistake and the vault will be unopenable. Okay, the serpent eating its tail, right? That's an Ouroboros. Uh, symbolizes the beginning and ending of time, right?

Bud: Yeah, I [00:27:00] mean, maybe.

Da'ryl: An Endless loop.

Bud: Nah, man. Nah, Herb. What you got?

Herb: I have no end and am the ending of all that begins. I'm the root of time and the branches of fate within. Death! It's a skull.

Bud: Okay, are you sure?

Herb: I don't know. I think so.

Bud: We're running out of time, man! We're run Come on! Press it! Herb, you did it, you're a gods damn genius man.

Da'ryl: Quickly, inside.

Bud: Oh man, oh man, oh man. I cannot wait to see what sweet ass treasures they got up in this @#$%. What the @#$%?

Herb: Where's all the treasure?

Bud: Where's all the treasures man? There ain't nothin' in here. Just some nasty old robes.

Herb: And books.

Bud: And a pedestal.

Da'ryl: Yeah, it looks like some sort of ceremonial chamber.

Bud: Why would you put this @#$% in a highly secure vault?

Herb: Look! Gerty's crystal ball. It's on the pedestal.

Da'ryl: Herb, [00:28:00] no, don't touch it! And we're trapped.

Bud: No, man, mm mm, no. I did not crawl through a mile of Dingledeuces just to get caught red handed. There's gotta be a way to open it from the inside, right? Right? Okay, ooh, okay, look! There's a handle on this side of the door. Herb, Herb, come here. See if you can get it open. Ooh, okay, don't hurt yourself. Oh.

Herb: Nope! Nope, it won't budge. It's not budging.

Da'ryl: Perhaps there's a failsafe switch, look around.

Herb: For what? What should I look for?

Da'ryl: Anything unusual.

Herb: I don't know, this is all pretty unusual to me.

Bud: Y’all, y’all over here, I think I got something. The hook this robe is hangin’ on moves. I think it’s a lever. I bet you five gold this opens the vault door.

Da'ryl: Mmm. Could be.

Bud: Come on, man, didn't move an inch. At least the alarm stopped, though. Gods, it's loud.

Herb: Bud! [00:29:00] Over here!

Da'ryl: The pedestal, it's a secret door.

Bud: Oh wow.

Herb: Stairs! Where do you think they go?

Da'ryl: Well, there's only one way to find out and we definitely can't stay here. I've got the crystal ball. Come on.

Herb: Whoa. These go a long way down. Do you think Mayor Dinglehopper even knows about this?

Da'ryl: Unlikely that he wouldn't. They're lit torches, clearly this is used regularly.

Bud: What is this place, man? Why does Dinglehopper need a vault that goes into a tunnel?

Da'ryl: A series of tunnels actually. Look here, water dripping down. This is good. We gotta be under the lake. Perhaps we can find an exit back to the main road.

Herb: Oh.

Bud: Yeah, good idea. Let's get the @#$%

Herb: Yeah.

Bud: outta here.

Herb: I think there's a light up ahead.

Thorne: Oy, you lot!

Bud: Oh @#$%, it's Sheriff Thorne!

Herb: Oh no.

Thorne: Don't you @#$%ing move.

Bud: [00:30:00] Oh! Oh hi Sheriff Thorne! Uh, wow, we are so glad to see you! Um, haha, yeah we are really turned around down here.

Herb: Yeah. just so lost. Could you help us find our way?

Thorne: Shut it.

Bud: Da'ryl, we gotta get the @#$% outta here, man. You got any tricks up your sleeve? Da'ryl, where the @#$% is Da'ryl?

Herb: Where'd he, where'd he go?

Thorne: Put your hands up. You're coming with me.

Bud: The Adventures of Bud and Herb is brought to you by The Pocket Dimension. Created and written by Anna Fitzgerald and Evan Bivins. Episode 4, The Crystal Ball Caper, stars Evan Bivins as Crygglinexxerflump "Bud" Buddlicker and Sheriff Thorne, Anna Fitzgerald as Herb, Seth McKay as Da'ryl X'orrin. Directed by Matthew Bivins. Produced and edited by Anna Fitzgerald, Evan Bivins, [00:31:00] Matthew Bivins, and Alison Kendrick. Sound design by Evan Bivins. Original character art and poster by Bridgit Connell. Special thanks to Alejandro Tey and Greg Hess. Please consider supporting our show by becoming a Patron at patreon.com/enterthepocketdimension. Or, find us on YouTube and all socials @enterthepocketdimension.